Benefits Near and Far

As evidenced by the sporadic posts, life has been pulling me away from blogging. Yet, I continue to produce art, trying new approaches and will be posting some of the new work in days, (yes days not weeks) to come. In the meantime, here my most recent poem. Since in a roundabout sort of way, Raleigh is the protagonist, I am also including a recent painting of him that I painted and donated to the local Japanese Tsunami Animal Relief efforts.

This painting is titled:

Raleigh in Front of Mt. Fuji in the Moonlight











Where Do We Go From Here?

Last night my two dogs and I attended our weekly agility class.

This is a sport where you run a course of obstacles with your dog.

The handler’s job is to clearly let the dog know what obstacle is next and the best way to take it.

From the sidelines, it looks very straightforward

and when I was merely an observer,

I used to wonder why so many people had such difficulty getting through the course,

and quite honestly,

why so many of them looked a little clumsy out there.

Then I took up the sport myself,

and now people who watch me are wondering the same thing.

How can something so simple and straightforward as a front cross

which is exactly what it says it is,

be so difficult to pull off,

not to mention with any semblance of grace?

But it is.

And I have videos of myself to prove it.

I practice on my own at home,

with and without my dog,

and think that I have it down pretty well

until I go to class, and completely blow it.

My classmates are very supportive and when I do something right

they cheer me on with shouts of encouragement.

But I know from personal experience of being on the sidelines myself,

that they are wondering how I can have such difficulty with what is essentially a change of direction.

The real tip off is when they glowingly praise my dog, Raleigh, who obediently does exactly what I direct him to do,

even though at least half of the time, the directions are wrong.

There has to be a truth in this.

Something about knowing where I stand in relation to obstacles or

accepting the fact that a good part of the time,

I don’t know as much as I think I do,

and that failure isn’t the end of the world.

But maybe the most important lesson is being modeled by Raleigh,

who doesn’t wonder about such things,

and doesn’t make a big deal about getting it right or wrong.

He simply loves to zoom through the course,

taking on whatever challenges are set in his way,

doing the best he can with imperfect guidance.

In the Beginning . . .

Life has been full and busy, so much so that I haven't had time to post the work and exciting things that have been going on. First, I am pleased to say that the painting of Emma featured in the last post was accepted in The Art Show at the Dog Show and will be shipped off to Wichita in a couple of days. It inspires me to do more watercolors but lately there is only this one titled In the Beginning, which I did for the Word and Example Exhibition on ECVA.org, a wonderful site that is worth a look, (we'll see if the painting gets accepted---I'll email the entry tomorrow). Otherwise I have been working on acrylics---new techniques, different imagery. As soon as something seems to come together, I will post it.

And as is the case these days, lots of time is going to Honor Flight, and the enthusiasm and support continue to grow for our Humboldt County project. Individuals, Rotary Clubs, other service clubs, bikers, veterans groups . . . the support has been terrific.

Another reentry

When I first started blogging I had good intentions of posting every day. Then it became every week. But somehow those weeks melt away and it has been months. What happened? Well, Honor Flight, the holidays, lots and lots of studio work, much of which has been experimental and not the kind of thing I want to post, however what the heck I may as well put a couple of things up later anyway.

Aside from drawing and painting, I have been doing lots of agility. Emma the 14 month old puppy has been so anxious to get started and she is absolutely ecstatic now that she is enrolled in lessons and actually doing agility instead of messing up Raleigh's runs (see video on previous post). In honor of this new phase of her life, I did the watercolor that you see above.

Speaking of honor . . . the Honor Flight Humboldt County project is off to a great start, and I thank all of you who have already donated, signed up to help, or put us in contact with veterans. We can always use more help, so please contact me if you are interested in being part of this very exciting and rewarding endeavor. Our flight is scheduled for April 15.

Honor Flight

You know, I do have good intentions of posting on a regular basis, and it shouldn't be so challenging. But I get caught up on making art, and when I only have works in progress and not much to show, I drop the ball. That may not be a very good excuse, but this is. This past weekend I participated as a guardian in Honor Flight. Here is the article that I wrote for the local paper:

As we crossed the Golden Gate Bridge we looked up and saw jets streaming across the sky, looping, flying in unison, doing incredible aerial acrobatics. The Blue Angels were in San Francisco. “Charles, look! How did they know that your Honor Flight weekend was just about to start?”

This was a fitting beginning to the trip of a lifetime. El Hilligoss and I had the privilege of accompanying Charles Moon, a WWII veteran to Washington DC to participate in Honor Flight.. We had driven down from Humboldt County that day and the following morning would meet up with 24 other WWII veterans, and 14 helpers, (guardians) at the SF Airport to catch our flight. Honor Flight is a program dedicated to taking these heroes to our nation’s capitol to see the WWII Memorial. This is a completely volunteer effort and there is no cost to the veterans. It was founded in 2005 by Earl Morse, a Retired Air Force Captain, who realized that time was running out. We are losing these veterans at the rate of more than 1200 each day--the youngest vets are now 85 years old, most are closer to 90. The vast majority have never seen the monument built in their honor, and more importantly, have never received the gratitude and honor which is their due.

Upon arrival at the airport, we were all given our uniforms for the trip. We guardians wore orange tee-shirts. On the back was the motto of Honor Flight Network, a quote from Will Rogers, “We can’t all be heroes. Some of us have to stand on the curb and clap as they go by”. Vets wore yellow. On the back was written: “If you can read this, thank a teacher. If you can read it in English, thank a veteran.”

That is what this program is all about, thanking these men and women, who never considered themselves to be heroes. In their own words, they were just kids just doing what needed to be done. And when the war was over, they came home, and got on with their lives. But what they did saved the world from tyranny and destruction of life as we know it.

Saturday morning we boarded our bus, and set out. The first stop was the WWII Memorial. Because of all of the walking this requires, most vets were in wheelchairs. Upon arrival we gathered for a group photo and then went to the California Pillar for the flag ceremony. Hattie, ninety-two years old (and weighing probably less than her years), placed the flag on the ledge, and we had a moment of silence and remembrance, followed by the Pledge of Allegiance. Never have those words had more meaning to me. We spent the next hour or so at the Memorial. I took a photo of Charles at the Oklahoma Pillar, his native state. We paused at the Wall of Stars, where 4000 golden stars represent the 400,000 lives that were lost in combat. It reads, Here We Mark the Price of Freedom. Honor Flight groups from Minnesota and Tennessee were there as well and we had a chance to visit with some of them. The accents may have been different, but the joy that was on their faces was the same.

During the course of the day, we also visited other Memorials---Viet Nam, Korea, Iwo Jima (the Marine’s Memorial), Air Force, Navy, and the Lincoln Memorial. At one o’clock we watched the changing of the guard at the Tomb of the Unknown Solder. As we drove through the city, we were also able to see the Washington Monument and Jefferson Memorials as well as other important sites in our nation’s capital. Not surprisingly, these guys were troopers, but I was still amazed at their energy and endurance. They are awesome. Night had fallen as we drove back to the hotel. Our leader Debby started to sing, and as she sang “God Bless America” forty voices joined in. This great country is indeed blessed in so many ways, and these fine people, these soldiers who fought to secure our freedom, are some of the greatest blessings of all. Being with them for this experience was one of the most memorable privileges of my life.

Honor Flight depends on contributions to make this possible. Time is running out and funds are needed. If you know of a WWII veteran who would like to participate, or to learn more about how you might help, please contact Honor Flight Northern California, 530-357-3380, or email them at info@honorflightnorcal.org. Or call Kathrin Burleson at 677-0490.

Back to Africa . . .

if only in these pages. I work in series, usually several, sometimes up to six paintings at a time, not counting the in progress and warm-up drawings that are usually going on. It works for me to have several projects so at any one time, so that I don't get too caught up in, or invested in, any one piece. What that means is that there are usually lots of paintings around the studio, in various stages of completion. It also means that quite a bit of time can pass before something is actually completed, so there are what seem like long, dry periods, when I am actually quite productive. It can be frustrating, but also kind of satisfying when some of them start coming together, and feeling complete. This is the first of the current batch to "hatch".

Raleigh's First Trials

When I started the not-in-real-time journal for Botswana (which is still not totally completed, I think that there is part of me that doesn't want for it to end), I never dreamed that I would be using that same approach for other topics as well. But somehow a cold virus that knocks you for a loop can let things pile up a bit. But the bright side is that I have had a few days to think about the experience before posting these photos and links to my new YouTube account. As you can probably surmise from this photo, Raleigh did pretty well his first time out. Most importantly, he loved the experience, and so did I. As you will see from this video (click HERE to access YouTube), Emma did as well, so much so that when she saw Raleigh out there, she could not control herself, pulled out of her collar, jumped off of Mike's lap, and onto the course. Fortunately the judges didn't disqualify me and Raleigh was able to take another go at it. Emma got a taste of the experience and is anxiously awaiting the time when she can really compete, rather than just messing up Raleigh's runs. He did go on to win a blue ribbon, (and her interference may have been a blessing in disguise since I had given him some inadequate signals and he was heading in the wrong direction anyway). But we both felt good about that second run (click HERE), and it was a great way to end the weekend. Many thanks to all of the good folks at CPE and Humdog who put in so much time and effort to make the weekend possible and give such joy to about 100 people and 150 dogs. We are looking forward to the next trials.

Pilgrimages of all sorts

Since this is a blog, a work in progress, I don't hold myself to chronology (as you might have noticed), so I am back to the Benedictine Experience. This is a sketch that I did on Desert Day, the Thursday when we have the opportunity to go deeper into silence and solitude, our own personal deserts. We made up sack lunches, were given some ideas to ponder, and then were left to our own devices. I took my sketchbook and walked back into the hills where I found a bench under a live oak tree overlooking the valley. The day was really hot so the shade was welcome and necessary. My plan was to stay there until the sun moved so that it was no longer shaded and then move on. As it turned out, it was shady all day, so I sat on that bench for over three hours---painting the valley, drawing other pilgrims as they walked up the path, reading, eating my sandwich, and having a little nap. It was glorious.

Speaking of fellow pilgrims, Helena Chan was new to BenEx this year, and brought wonderful fresh energy and insights. I sat next to her during a few of the discussions and couldn't help but glance over and notice her notes. She uses the same kind of black bound sketchbook and Artpen that I often use, but the results are very different. She is an engineer, and a very neat person, which really showed in those clear, straight lines of beautiful script and perfectly organized thoughts. And she had no ink on her fingers from that pen! I was so impressed and amazed that I couldn't resist commenting, and pointing it out to others. Helena wrote a bit about the week which she posted on St. Paul Cathedral blog on August 2. She writes beautifully, in both senses of the word, and it really is worth a look.

Mix Those Media!

I just returned from a three-day workshop in Mendocino. The course description looked very interesting, and just what I needed to push my edges a little bit. My approach to making art is pretty straightforward and simple, and I am probably happiest using just a pencil, or just a pen, and if I do use color I prefer a very limited palette. If there are too many colors I get overwhelmed, and even a little anxious (kind of how I feel when I look at a closet with too many choices of clothing--see conversation with Charmion below). In any case, I thought it might be good to get out of my comfort zone, which I definitely did.

The teacher Mira White is a master who creates beautiful visionary pieces using a wide range of materials. (We also discovered that we have a mutual connection to Meher Baba, but I'll save that for another time and post). My fellow students were a very compatible group of seven, with at least one thing in common---they didn't hold back. And everyone, except for me, seemed very comfortable starting with a totally abstract approach and came up with some very interesting work. I may not have created anything particularly notable, but I learned something really important about the way I work---I tend to start from something concrete and work toward the abstract. I do this in painting and in poetry. Kind of like a Lectio Divina approach to art.

Several of the projects started with spraying, pouring or smearing color on the surface and seeing what developed. So I would dutifully do that, and then just stand there and look at it, bewildered. Once I did start working, I would beat it to death until all of the interesting paint effects were covered up by a fairly mundane and lifeless drawing. Oh well. I have no doubt that some of those effects and techniques will inform my work to come, and I am interested to see how that develops. In any case, it was an enjoyable and worthwhile experience.

(The dog is Patch, John's helper)

I like to carry my sketchbook with me and now include some watercolor pencils which are very handy for quick sketches. Often I think that I should draw something besides the view out over the valley, but those Sonoma Mountains are so compelling for me that at the end of the week, I have pages and pages of sketches of them in different light. I was born and raised in Petaluma, and my earliest visual memory is the view over the Petaluma valley from the front porch of our little house, seeing those violet hills. So the view from Bishop's Ranch touches me at a very deep place. Someone once said (I think that it was Camus) that an artist usually spends his whole life trying to recapture his first visual memory, and I can relate to that. That vista is irresistible to me.

Simplicity in all things

I am home now, back into kind of a routine, admittedly a little disorganized and chaotic compared to last week, but I have hopes that now that I am settled back in, starting tomorrow, I will be able to incorporate some of what I learned and experienced. But before I get too involved in the quotidian, I want to share some of the highlights of this past week. I wish I could say that I had a spiritual shakedown, or meltdown, and have a much more profound relationship to God and creation, but that wouldn't be quite honest. However, I did get some tools, and had some wonderful experiences, and having the psalms and scripture swirling in my head today, has been such a gift. (What's that? Oh yes, the Song of Zechariah.) And I met some fascinating people.

The last day I had a very interesting conversation with Charmion, and in addition to having a lovely and unusual name,she had some very interesting things to share. We were talking about simplicity, and how to deal with clutter, which is a topic I love to explore, so I asked her how she dealt with having to many things, for example, clothes. She said that she owns eight of everything---pants, tops, skirts, etc,---in different colors, and each day she just wears what is on the next hanger. After she has had something for six years, she gives it away and replaces it. Now think about that for a minute. She NEVER wonders what to wear. Can you imagine how much time you would save if you never had to wonder, or worse, try things on and change your mind, and then try something else? Oh, and she never shops in stores, but buys everything online from Lands End. We did agree that both Land End and LL Bean have gone down in quality and reliability, but nevertheless, that's what she does. This was very intriguing to me, and I am inspired to come up with a similar strategy. Now, keep in mind, that this is a woman who was on Jeopardy in the early 1980's and won $5000, which she used to buy her first computer. Oh, and she sings beautifully as well. Like I said below, I am so glad that we don't have to keep silence all week.

BenEx Dogs

A predictable but difficult challenge with silent retreats these days, is that hardly anyone leaves their phone at home, or even their laptop for that matter, so it tends to encroach on the sense of being away ( I mean, here I am, blogging, when the schedule says I should be resting in preparation for Lectio Divina later this afternoon). But a plus to this is that we are able to share images that people have on their IPhones, and for some reason, people feel compelled to show me their dogs. This is Henry.
There must be a greater meaning to this because the reading at lunch today had to do with, what else, a dog and how it came to be part of a Benedictine monastery. So, I'll just go with it, and post more images as I receive them.

Work

One of the things that we do here during the week, in keeping with the Benedictine ethos, is to choose work that we will do in the afternoon. None of it is very complicated, mainly things like stuffing envelopes, trimming pods from the wisteria (before this, I didn’t know that they were so inclined to propagate and spread), deadhead the rose bushes, rake leaves, simple things like that. Way on the bottom of the list of choices was washing windows. Not surprisingly, no one signed up for that. I say not surprisingly, but the truth is that I love to wash windows, and have never understood why so many people don’t. That little phrase supposedly uttered by many a housekeeper “I don’t do windows” always sort of baffled me. So, I signed up, and have spent the last couple of afternoons washing the windows in the refectory and Swing Pavilion. I like it because it is solitary work, and the results are so immediate and apparent. Stepping back to see that clear, sparkling glass is so satisfying.

What has surprised me, is since I started doing the windows, one of the first things I think about when I wake up in the morning (around 5:00) is how much I am looking forward to washing windows that day. It really is kind of strange, especially when I am currently listening to a set of CDs by the wonderful poet and thinker, David Whyte, called What to Remember When Waking Up. Needless to say no where does he mention anything as mundane as washing windows. It’s especially odd in a context like this week, where I am surrounded and immersed in scripture, prayer, and chanting the psalms.

Beyond Windex

There must be something primal about washing windows,

although it couldn’t be too primal because in the large scheme of things
windows haven’t been around that long.
But regardless of that,
the deep satisfaction that I derive from this chore
goes way beyond simple housework
and touches something deep inside.
Why else would I wake early looking forward to this particular task,
especially here while here on retreat,
where I have been given such beautiful and profound thoughts to ponder?

It must be something about vision,
or clarity, or boundaries--
the false divisions that I draw between what is inside and outside,
between me and the rest of the world,
between me and God.

Maybe it’s the satisfaction of knowing that with a little time, a bit of tending,
and a little elbow grease,
I can see through a glass less darkly,
even if just for a little while.

Silent variations

Whatever It Takes

I wonder if it was just a coincidence that my ears got plugged with wax last week
just before I was scheduled to start an eight day silent retreat.
The over-the-counter solution that I tried only seemed to make things worse,
and after a couple of treatments, I could hardly hear a thing.
This had never happened to me before.
The silence enclosed me like a bubble,
and it was like being on my own personal silent retreat,
surrounded by quiet wherever I went.
In a way, it was good preparation for this week,
a reminder that the chatter that normally fills my days doesn't really amount to much.
But my ears cleared up just before I left,
and I am glad to be able to hear those birds chirping in the trees,
as I settle into this mostly silent community.

A few words from the Ranch

This experience is winding down, but at the same time getting richer and richer, as the community forms and the participants are no longer an amorphous group of people, but have become specific and precious individuals with whom I feel so fortunate to share this time.

After the morning presentation on various aspects of the Benedictine life (today it was Lectio Divina and balance), given by Sr. Donald, we have a short time for group discussion. During the break, we usually fit in a few private conversations. One priest participant and I discovered that we had both visited Pune, India, and compared notes of our experiences. After the usual observations about the poverty, filth and such, he thought for a while and said that after having been in India, he lost his taste for green tea. Don't you love that? I never in a million years would have expected him to say that. Some people talk about having their spiritual life opened up, or shaken, or deepened, but for him, who seems so at ease and grounded in his faith, it was green tea and he is now back to coffee. There has to be some profound spiritual insight in that. This is also the guy who today was wearing a tee shirt that had written on it in big letters, "Does "anal retentive" have a hyphen?"

This evening, I had conversation with a librarian who told me about her recent conversion experience. A nominal Episcopalian for many years, she had a series of encounters with the Divine that have brought her to an incredibly close and intimate relationship with God--a direct, clear call to her vocation. Hearing stories of such personal, and totally compelling events, is such a blessing, so I am grateful that we are not held to complete silence this week.

If we were held to complete silence, and some serious person were enforcing it, I would probably be in trouble, as after dinner tonight I couldn't help myself when it came to helping Josh take a picture of three participants in the dining room. I am afraid that I got a little bossy (very unlike me) and just grabbed his camera and started giving directions. But the picture is going to be good, and Josh even got to be in it.

Another hiatus

I am now in Sonoma County at the Benedictine Experience, a week long retreat. This is my third time here for this experience at Bishop’s Ranch in Healdsburg. There are about thirty of us in community, observing the Daily Offices, keeping silence (mostly) and following the Benedictine balance of prayer, work, study, and recreation. And while it isn’t as exciting as Africa, there is something very compelling about the rhythm of the Daily Office and structured days, and it’s refreshing to be away from so much of the world. Last time I was here, I did a lot of writing and posting (see archives), but this time is different---more silence, prayer, and reflection.

I may be posting a few items from the Ranch later this week, but in the meantime, I just wanted to explain my silence (tiny bit of a play on words there).

Artists for Conservation

My new site at Artists for Conservation is now up and running. Please check it out.

Cheetah

We came upon these two brothers just as they were finishing up their afternoon meal-a late lunch of some antelope that wasn't fast enough to escape his fate that day. They took turns working on the kill, so we could see one sitting up, looking around, perhaps taking that moment to digest a bit, while only the back of the other would be visible. We could hear the crunches as he ate and tore apart the prey (best not to think about that too much). After lunch they strolled off, later taking a few minutes to clean each other off, or maybe just making sure that none of that fresh blood that was smeared over their muzzles went to waste.

This beauty was sauntering across the road when we were on our way out to the bush. She stopped, turned around, and just looked at us. We turned off the engine and just looked back. I wish I could that I did this painting right there on the spot, but unfortunately I didn't have my watercolors with me. Considering how long she stood there, I probably would have had time, but I took a photo and did this in my studio.